Ramadan Special: Different Lives - Bonding in Roadha mas

We all live in these same islands, yet we each lead separate, unique lives. Different Lives is a segment where we seek to appreciate and share the differences in shapes of lives in different households, currently with a focus on Ramadan.

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A shared game of Scrabble.

Mariyath Mohamed

2024-03-15 12:18:07

"And the case was never solved..."

The ominous voice ended the narration, and she turned off the TV. Placing the remote away, she turned towards me, cup of tea in hand, cozily curled up in her special rocking chair.

"That's what I do for stress relief. Crime shows, murder mysteries, psychological thrillers...they make me feel energized, rejuvenated," she said with a smile.

A lot of people can identify with this hobby, I'm sure, as true crime and mysteries have recently become one of the most popular genres of books, TV and film.

It's after midnight on a Thursday night and this mother of three is sitting down with me to share some insight into what her life is like.

Sisters, and mamma

This is a home filled with laughter. With bonding. With shared responsibilities and shared joys.

Cake for Mamma

With her eldest daughter having moved out with a family of her own, this mother now lives with the younger two of her three daughters. Her eldest visits regularly, accompanied by her son-in-law and two grandkids.

During the year, with the mother working, the eldest daughter opts to care for the younger siblings after school, ensuring a wholesome environment for all.

"'Roadha mas", and its perks

"Roadha mas" (Ramadan) brought with it shorter work/school schedules for all.

She works from home, with a few hours of popping into work at night if required. The kids, although in different sessions, are still both home together from 2 pm onwards.

And so Roadha mas brings with it the added advantage of allowing more quality time to be spent together.

On a typical day, she wakes up the kids at 3.30 am, to share a meal for 'haaru' (Suhoor - the meal eaten before dawn during Ramadan, after which people fast until after sunset).

With the prayer call for Fajr, the three lay out prayer mats and offer their prayers together.

They then go about their individual schedules until after 2pm, when they all gather in the kitchen to prepare food for iftar [breaking fast]. With much fun and laughter, they engage in preparing their shared favourites together, with the eldest often joining in when she can.

Roadha veellun

Of course it must be noted here that sausage rolls and cinnamon rolls are family favourites!

After iftar, maghrib prayers are also offered in congregation by the family. These two prayers are offered together by the three of them, while the rest are completed separately as each individual's schedule allows time.

Nights are for fun and games, with 'Anhen/Firihen' (Girl/Boy) being quoted as peak entertainment for the entire family. Curiousity piqued, I asked them to elaborate.

So this is a game where each player needs a pen and a page divided into columns marked Girl/Boy/Thing/Country/Song or Movie. A letter of the alphabet is then randomly selected, and players try to beat each other's time in being the fastest to fill up the columns with relevant words beginning from that letter.

Anhen/Firihen - a game.

Asked who is the uncontested winner of the game, it turns out that this was a hilariously contentious topic up for much lighthearted squabbling and laughter.

This is a family that plays a lot of games together, with carrom, Monopoly and Scrabble being listed amongst regulars.

Once the kids are safely in bed, the mother prepares food for "suhoor" before settling down for her alone time: watching mysteries and thrillers.

Best thing about life, as it is

"We live our lives in a way that makes us happy. We are, of course, considerate of all around us, but we are not constantly working to reach society's expectations, or a certain individual's expectations. We live righteously, we do good, and we are happy. It is a liberating way of life."

Haaru

If you could change anything about life, what would it be?

She did not have to put much thought into this one, so it appears this is a much considered thought.

"I would like to move abroad with my family."

Asked why, she responded that she believed it would open up better opportunities for her children and herself.

"This is something I have always wanted, ever since I was in school myself. I feel we will have better quality of life. Better education options, better environment".

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